Haven’t updated in awhile. Don’t really know what to say; my life is pretty boring. The cleaning business isn’t taking off like I had hoped. I think people are more concerned about heating their houses this winter rather than cleaning their houses. Fuel prices have dropped dramatically all over the country; except for here. Even though we have a refinery in our back yard, we are still over a dollar more a gallon than the Lower 48.
I’ve been pretty down lately. Seems like no matter what I try to do, it just ain’t good enough. Then there’s the feeling of ‘why bother?’ that penetrates most aspects of my life. I can’t seem to find motivation to do much of anything, and that does bother me. I have nothing to work towards, no retirement with the one I love, or anything like that. I just go through the motions, day after day. No joy, very little happiness.
I think that if I could, I would simply pack up and move. Alaska has been the best experience of my life, but anymore I am feeling so isolated. My kids and grandkids are so far away; immediate family consists of a dog and two cats. My phone never rings anymore. The supposed ‘friends’ that I had a year ago are long gone. Left about the same time the money did. Interesting, but oh so predictable I guess.
The thought of facing yet another set of holidays alone is, daunting to say the least. I barely made it through last years’ set. I don’t know if I can do it this year. Or if I even want to.
